D3 body, D1 cock
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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