how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
