he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
