it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
