I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
not ubering you a puppy
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