Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize