You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Randomize
