i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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