just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
