Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
