My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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