I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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