I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
