He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
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