Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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