i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
