physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
