And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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