id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
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