so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
