come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
