At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
love makes seman taste better
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
