Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
