I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
