Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
