my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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