We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
