I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
