I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
