at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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