You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
