How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
