Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
