Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
