So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize