I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
It was confusing and full of hummus
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
