why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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