That's intense
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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