So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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