Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
