it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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