did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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