youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
