Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
