he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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