She's JV to your varsity
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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