you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
