He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
