talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
