What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
