The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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